It's a cliche in movies that when somebody outraged says "do you know who I am," we're supposed to understand they're horrible. But I don't think it's ridiculous. It's exhausting to have to constantly re-prove myself to people who assume I have no qualifications, instead of being able to point to any of my experience or reputation, instead of having a cushion of trust.
On the one hand, I get it. They don't have a way to know my resume by looking at me, and it has some unusual stuff on it. On the other hand, I feel like I'm living in "men explain things to me."
I have spent the last two weeks having people worry about whether I can handle singing a Christmas carol with a couple of kids at an assisted living facility, which would probably be insulting in itself, but it's incredibly exhausting when I've spent all day giving notes on a stage musical I wrote, making plans to get down to perform live music at a club in NYC, checking on the song I just released, and researching which local bars I might want to approach about getting back into gigging. I've working as a live musician since I was three, and sometimes bandleader or musical director or accompanist or music teacher. It's a big part of how I supported myself up until the years I needed to be home in the evenings for family reasons.
All of that is invisible. All of that is a life people cannot imagine me having. It's very difficult.
On the one hand, I get it. They don't have a way to know my resume by looking at me, and it has some unusual stuff on it. On the other hand, I feel like I'm living in "men explain things to me."
I have spent the last two weeks having people worry about whether I can handle singing a Christmas carol with a couple of kids at an assisted living facility, which would probably be insulting in itself, but it's incredibly exhausting when I've spent all day giving notes on a stage musical I wrote, making plans to get down to perform live music at a club in NYC, checking on the song I just released, and researching which local bars I might want to approach about getting back into gigging. I've working as a live musician since I was three, and sometimes bandleader or musical director or accompanist or music teacher. It's a big part of how I supported myself up until the years I needed to be home in the evenings for family reasons.
All of that is invisible. All of that is a life people cannot imagine me having. It's very difficult.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-12-14 05:31 am (UTC)Unless you are known to be rude to kids or the elderly, people should not worry about that, period.
In context, nonetheless, jeeeez. *hugs* if useful.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-12-14 12:13 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2022-12-14 05:55 pm (UTC)That does sound exhausting. I wish they knew how lucky they are to have you.
(no subject)
Date: 2023-12-15 08:21 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2023-12-16 12:56 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2023-12-16 01:42 am (UTC)