One of the Mysteries of the War

I have developed the charming new habit of chewing the insides of my mouth raw while I sleep. I believe (seriously) that this was accidentally implanted as a hypnotic suggestion by my friend Stephanie, who mentioned over the phone that she does this when she is stressed.

I've been saying for a while that Obama reminds me of Lincoln, and with that in mind, I'm pretty glad George McClellan isn't our commander in Afganistan. That guy was a good planner and organizer, but as Wikipedia puts it, "these attributes may have hampered his ability to challenge aggressive opponents in a fast-moving battlefield environment." You said it, guys. The last thing we need now is to get defeated at Bull Run/Manassas. If Stonewall Jackson shows up to lead a Taliban bayonet charge, I am moving to the moon.