Somewhere I Must Have Done Something Wrong in Getting Here

I'm getting better at leaving. That doesn't make it easier - just smoother. I've got the timing down, shortcuts and workarounds; I can cut it shorter. Give myself less time to cry in. I can back mechanically. I can pick the right thing to read on the plane. I head to a place with friends and plans; know what my bed feels like and where to eat lunch.

I arrive, and Ciro's not here. It doesn't get easier.

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"I just want to hide under my desk and cry, but when I come out everything will be saline." - jonquil, a misquote