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No Refills
Aug. 28th, 2001 11:55 am1:30 AM. I am sleeping, or trying to sleep, in preparation for my first day of class. (I am late anyway, but this has little to do with waking up late and much relation to the faulty algorithms my university uses to allocate parking.)
The phone rings.
Valancy answers with admonitions that I should go back to sleep, then proceeds to speak very loudly, thus preventing me from following her instruction. Never mind that I wasn't asleep in the first place.
Now, there are any number of people who have good reason to call at such an off-peak hour. There's Kim, for example, who still hasn't had her baby despite all predictions and labor pains to the contrary. Or there's my family, with whom I am feuding and to whom I have not spoken in several days despite the fact that I ostensibly live with them. Or there's Valancy's grandparents, whom we are constantly told have only one day to live. There are numerous overseas friends who forget to calculate time zones and may or may not be in prison at any given moment.
It is Turtle. She has had An Epiphany. Val and I agree that she was probably a bit drunk, but that's okay, because we were too. (Ah, Spanish wine.)
Turtle is not gay. This is the epiphany. It doesn't come as a surprise to either me or Val, given that Turtle only hooks up with guys and only dates guys and is in a quazi-relationship with a male scientist in Indonesia (although she does have a crush on Catherine Zeta Jones. Who doesn't?) But it was very important to Turtle that she get her point across. She, apparently, is not gay. I try to muster the energy to act surprised, even though I am not the one on the telephone.
She is trying to explain, we think, why she is not in love with Valancy. This is a subject about which she's always felt very guilty, because it seems to her that she should be. Since she is not gay, this is rather silly, and I think she's finally picked up on that.
The other half of the epiphany is that Turtle wants to be wiccan because it seems to be what she believes in, but she's previously been scared of learning more in case she finds out it isn't. Again, this is only a surprise to Turtle, who has a familiar, works in an occult book store, constantly badgers me about finding spells even though I'm Taoist, and intensively studies the uses of herbs.
The best part of all this is that Turtle is supposedly a psychologist.
At this point, the conversation derails as a drunken Valancy starts talking about how cool The Avengers are, having just watched "The House That Jack Built" for the first time. (Prior to that, she had not seen a single episode, even though I talk about them constantly and number one on my list of life goals is "be more like John Steed." Incidentally, if I had to cast someone to play Valancy, it would be a young Diana Rigg. Looks right, talks right, moves right.)
It devolves further into giggling about being drunk. I sneeze, and once again Valancy orders me to go back to sleep.
More giggling.
It was a good sort of night.
The phone rings.
Valancy answers with admonitions that I should go back to sleep, then proceeds to speak very loudly, thus preventing me from following her instruction. Never mind that I wasn't asleep in the first place.
Now, there are any number of people who have good reason to call at such an off-peak hour. There's Kim, for example, who still hasn't had her baby despite all predictions and labor pains to the contrary. Or there's my family, with whom I am feuding and to whom I have not spoken in several days despite the fact that I ostensibly live with them. Or there's Valancy's grandparents, whom we are constantly told have only one day to live. There are numerous overseas friends who forget to calculate time zones and may or may not be in prison at any given moment.
It is Turtle. She has had An Epiphany. Val and I agree that she was probably a bit drunk, but that's okay, because we were too. (Ah, Spanish wine.)
Turtle is not gay. This is the epiphany. It doesn't come as a surprise to either me or Val, given that Turtle only hooks up with guys and only dates guys and is in a quazi-relationship with a male scientist in Indonesia (although she does have a crush on Catherine Zeta Jones. Who doesn't?) But it was very important to Turtle that she get her point across. She, apparently, is not gay. I try to muster the energy to act surprised, even though I am not the one on the telephone.
She is trying to explain, we think, why she is not in love with Valancy. This is a subject about which she's always felt very guilty, because it seems to her that she should be. Since she is not gay, this is rather silly, and I think she's finally picked up on that.
The other half of the epiphany is that Turtle wants to be wiccan because it seems to be what she believes in, but she's previously been scared of learning more in case she finds out it isn't. Again, this is only a surprise to Turtle, who has a familiar, works in an occult book store, constantly badgers me about finding spells even though I'm Taoist, and intensively studies the uses of herbs.
The best part of all this is that Turtle is supposedly a psychologist.
At this point, the conversation derails as a drunken Valancy starts talking about how cool The Avengers are, having just watched "The House That Jack Built" for the first time. (Prior to that, she had not seen a single episode, even though I talk about them constantly and number one on my list of life goals is "be more like John Steed." Incidentally, if I had to cast someone to play Valancy, it would be a young Diana Rigg. Looks right, talks right, moves right.)
It devolves further into giggling about being drunk. I sneeze, and once again Valancy orders me to go back to sleep.
More giggling.
It was a good sort of night.
