Laying it Out
Jul. 15th, 2006 01:27 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
rinueI've always moved on quickly, perhaps because endings rarely take me by surprise; I do my crying in the denouement. I like movement; I like clean slates. Every exit an entrance somewhere else.
Patrick and I split up a few weeks ago. The reasons are legion, but boil down to this: I'm right more often than he is, and that's a hard thing to take. Over time, it eroded Patrick's confidence and sense of self, and pushed me into an inappropriate teacher/father/God role, which often made me feel like a bully. We tried to fix things in every way we could, but eventually decided we should pull a White Stripes and start telling people we're cousins. Now we get along famously once again, hang out most days, and feel a general sense of relief. Although there has been some grieving, it faded fast; it is hard to be sad when we're both so obviously happy apart. Being cousins suits us excellent well.
Incidentally, it was Patrick who broke things off. Although there is a part of me that can't comprehend why anyone would not want to spend every possible minute in my company, I'm very proud of Patrick for having the strength and insight to make what is ultimately the right decision. I don't think I held on because I was any more in love; I'm just more stubborn. And it's hard to have a bruised ego when someone leaves you for being intimidatingly awesome and/or god-like.
So, anybody who is worried about me - or Patrick - need not fear. We're doing great. The only negative effects I'm experiencing are diminished appetite and an excess of nervous energy, both of which are better attributed to a non-Patrick-related cause.
Patrick and I split up a few weeks ago. The reasons are legion, but boil down to this: I'm right more often than he is, and that's a hard thing to take. Over time, it eroded Patrick's confidence and sense of self, and pushed me into an inappropriate teacher/father/God role, which often made me feel like a bully. We tried to fix things in every way we could, but eventually decided we should pull a White Stripes and start telling people we're cousins. Now we get along famously once again, hang out most days, and feel a general sense of relief. Although there has been some grieving, it faded fast; it is hard to be sad when we're both so obviously happy apart. Being cousins suits us excellent well.
Incidentally, it was Patrick who broke things off. Although there is a part of me that can't comprehend why anyone would not want to spend every possible minute in my company, I'm very proud of Patrick for having the strength and insight to make what is ultimately the right decision. I don't think I held on because I was any more in love; I'm just more stubborn. And it's hard to have a bruised ego when someone leaves you for being intimidatingly awesome and/or god-like.
So, anybody who is worried about me - or Patrick - need not fear. We're doing great. The only negative effects I'm experiencing are diminished appetite and an excess of nervous energy, both of which are better attributed to a non-Patrick-related cause.
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(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-17 08:47 pm (UTC)If you're in a stage where you're peppering your social calendar with a heavier hand, let me know (i.e. let's hang out).
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-17 08:59 pm (UTC)cheers,
Romie
(no subject)
Date: 2006-07-17 10:03 pm (UTC)I'm up for parties! Let me know if you know a dj, b/c I know someone who can make some tunes to make the booties shake (he uses a laptop). And if you're interested in booty shaking I can definitely keep you posted about the stuff I know.