Short Like Your Mom

Whenever I get really sick, I have the creeping suspicion I'm actually faking. I imagine this hearkens to the old days of skipping school by "feeling bad" - that, or too many hypnotists in the family. In any case, it astounds me - I mean really floors me - any time I actually have a fever or, for example, vomit non-stop for 48 hours.


I sort of try and get silly about it to show everybody I'm just joking and all, kind of horsing around and being funny, but then it turns out that I am in fact in the bathroom again, or still, and the water isn't usually that color. I feel like a wuss, I really do. It's hard to persuade someone you control an army of pirate-ninjas when you can't confront red jello.

Incidentally, doing better now. First day in five out of bed - dressed even. Thirsty. Moving soon.