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Nov. 14th, 2006 01:04 am
rinue: (Star)
[personal profile] rinue
I left my fingernails untrimmed during and running up to the shoot, in case fingernails were needed to prise ornery cases or adjust tiny screws. Therefore my fingernails are currently longer than they have perhaps ever been - the white part is nearly an eighth of an inch! Good heavens! It's driving me crazy.

The fact that I don't tend to mention people by name, and that when I do I don't describe them, should not be taken for dislike. Rather, I am nervous about things like casts of characters; I don't tend to talk about someone in this journal until I'm relatively certain they'll stay around and stay important, just because I don't want readers to have to keep track of bit players. This is perhaps a wrong-headed approach. For instance, Ciro is barely mentioned in the entry about meeting Ciro, and during the subsequent months, though we were frequently in close company, the only place this is mentioned in my journal is "current music" - his voice in the background while I was writing.

I also worry when I mention a name too often - as I am doing now with Ciro's - that it will become a droning annoyance, that readers will be vexed by such an overwhelming other presence in a journal they read to find out about me. Then I start thinking myself into a corner - is it egocentric to only talk about myself and my internal life, or egocentric to talk about other things when the medium and audience suggest I should be writing about me? This is the kind of ridiculous back and forth that occurs at one in the morning, but which reflects a current preoccupation with introductions and external perceptions and which stories should and shouldn't be told.
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