Swiftboat Veterans for Truth
Aug. 24th, 2004 04:51 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
rinue[CUT TO: medium shot of MIDDLE-AGED MAN IN POLO SHIRT standing in a PARK]
MAN: I went to school with John Kerry, and when he was five, his cursive handwriting was totally illegible. I mean, he'd be so proud of the way he wrote his name, but half of it would be in totally unneccessary capital letters. That's a sign of ego.
[CUT TO: medium shot of OLDER WOMAN in a NURSERY]
WOMAN: John Kerry was still wearing diapers at age two. I know, because I was there. I changed those diapers as his baby sitter. Or, well, my best friend was his babysitter and I came along one time.
[CUT TO: medium shot of BALDING MAN sitting at a DESK]
MAN: When I was nine, and I was in my school's geography bee, John Kerry couldn't remember the average annual rainfall of Lima, Peru. Now he's saying he'll fix our foreign policy. I just want people to know the truth.
[CUT TO: slow ZOOM on unflattering PHOTOGRAPH of JOHN KERRY]
V/O: Do we really want a president with a hyperactive bladder? A president who can't remember basic facts about our allies? A president who can barely sign his own name?
[CUT TO: medium shot of a SHERIFF]
SHERIFF: Just after George W. Bush got his license, I gave him a parking ticket for parking in front of a fire hydrant up by the high school. He never had much use for laws.
[CUT TO: medium shot of MIDDLE AGED WOMAN, holding a BABY]
WOMAN: I didn't go to school with George W. Bush, but I did go to school, and I heard he sometimes wears concealer when he knows he's going to appear on camera. Makeup's supposed to be for women.
[CUT TO: medium shot of a CORPORATE EXECUTIVE]
EXECUTIVE: I sat across from George in Mrs. Mayer's third grade class, and on Valentine's Day, he bragged about getting the most valentines, even though he only got 24 and Melissa Cotter got 26 because Reggie Smith gave her three. That was typical George. I'm not sure how someone like that is supposed to balance the budget.
[CUT TO: stock footage of BUSH shaking hands with members of a CROWD]
V/O: Do we really want a president who can't obey the law? A president with gender confusion? A president who fails to grasp simple addition?
[CUT TO: stock footage of the AMERICAN FLAG fluttering in the WIND]
V/O: Whoever you vote for in November, remember the truth.
[GRAPHIC: This advertisement was brought to you by Concerned Citizens for Honesty.]
Look, I love history as much as the next guy. More than the next guy, in most cases. When I'm on vacation, I don't go shopping or hang out by the pool; I visit the houses of Civil War generals. I look at tiny pieces of metal which were used by ancient Romans. When I'm bored, I brush up on the Boxer Rebellion, or the Boer War. I watch documentaries for fun. And if I was watching a documentary about Vietnam that interviewed current political figures about their involvement, I'd probably be pretty entertained.
I do not, however, see how it is relevant to the current election.
The Iraq War is not Vietnam. Let's get that out of the way right now. We entered Vietnam at the request of the international community, particularly the French. We entered Iraq under condemnation from the international community, particularly France. Vietnam had a draft. Iraq doesn't. Vietnam was in the jungle. Iraq is in the desert. Vietnam was embroiled in a bloody civil war about political systems. Iraq is not involved in a civil war, and its major conflict involves religion. Any "lessons" learned from Vietnam are not particularly relevant to Iraq. Anybody who says otherwise has a political axe to grind.
I don't care whether John Kerry did or didn't support the troops in Vietnam. I don't care whether George W. Bush did or didn't support the troops in Vietnam. I'm incredibly tired of this Red America/Blue America bullshit which basically boils down to, again, how you felt about Vietnam. It was 40 years ago. I wasn't even born 40 years ago.
Imagine if we made all our decisions using this criterion: "no, I don't watch CBS tonight because I didn't like the show that aired in this timeslot 40 years ago." Get fucking lives.
If you want to debate the current election, debate what's happened in the last five years. There's plenty there to work with. Nope, wait, I'd rather talk about the decisions candidates made when they were 20. Shit, I don't even care what I did when I was 20, and it involved me.
I think we should all think really hard about what our lives are like now, and how dissimilar our current selves are to our 20-year-old selves. It doesn't matter how long ago you were 20; it could be just last year. Then we should all think about how completely pathetic it is that so much national attention is being focused on guys who are still whining about who met Jane Fonda and who was better at cards. It's like the grand triumph of Kim DuToit.
MAN: I went to school with John Kerry, and when he was five, his cursive handwriting was totally illegible. I mean, he'd be so proud of the way he wrote his name, but half of it would be in totally unneccessary capital letters. That's a sign of ego.
[CUT TO: medium shot of OLDER WOMAN in a NURSERY]
WOMAN: John Kerry was still wearing diapers at age two. I know, because I was there. I changed those diapers as his baby sitter. Or, well, my best friend was his babysitter and I came along one time.
[CUT TO: medium shot of BALDING MAN sitting at a DESK]
MAN: When I was nine, and I was in my school's geography bee, John Kerry couldn't remember the average annual rainfall of Lima, Peru. Now he's saying he'll fix our foreign policy. I just want people to know the truth.
[CUT TO: slow ZOOM on unflattering PHOTOGRAPH of JOHN KERRY]
V/O: Do we really want a president with a hyperactive bladder? A president who can't remember basic facts about our allies? A president who can barely sign his own name?
[CUT TO: medium shot of a SHERIFF]
SHERIFF: Just after George W. Bush got his license, I gave him a parking ticket for parking in front of a fire hydrant up by the high school. He never had much use for laws.
[CUT TO: medium shot of MIDDLE AGED WOMAN, holding a BABY]
WOMAN: I didn't go to school with George W. Bush, but I did go to school, and I heard he sometimes wears concealer when he knows he's going to appear on camera. Makeup's supposed to be for women.
[CUT TO: medium shot of a CORPORATE EXECUTIVE]
EXECUTIVE: I sat across from George in Mrs. Mayer's third grade class, and on Valentine's Day, he bragged about getting the most valentines, even though he only got 24 and Melissa Cotter got 26 because Reggie Smith gave her three. That was typical George. I'm not sure how someone like that is supposed to balance the budget.
[CUT TO: stock footage of BUSH shaking hands with members of a CROWD]
V/O: Do we really want a president who can't obey the law? A president with gender confusion? A president who fails to grasp simple addition?
[CUT TO: stock footage of the AMERICAN FLAG fluttering in the WIND]
V/O: Whoever you vote for in November, remember the truth.
[GRAPHIC: This advertisement was brought to you by Concerned Citizens for Honesty.]
Look, I love history as much as the next guy. More than the next guy, in most cases. When I'm on vacation, I don't go shopping or hang out by the pool; I visit the houses of Civil War generals. I look at tiny pieces of metal which were used by ancient Romans. When I'm bored, I brush up on the Boxer Rebellion, or the Boer War. I watch documentaries for fun. And if I was watching a documentary about Vietnam that interviewed current political figures about their involvement, I'd probably be pretty entertained.
I do not, however, see how it is relevant to the current election.
The Iraq War is not Vietnam. Let's get that out of the way right now. We entered Vietnam at the request of the international community, particularly the French. We entered Iraq under condemnation from the international community, particularly France. Vietnam had a draft. Iraq doesn't. Vietnam was in the jungle. Iraq is in the desert. Vietnam was embroiled in a bloody civil war about political systems. Iraq is not involved in a civil war, and its major conflict involves religion. Any "lessons" learned from Vietnam are not particularly relevant to Iraq. Anybody who says otherwise has a political axe to grind.
I don't care whether John Kerry did or didn't support the troops in Vietnam. I don't care whether George W. Bush did or didn't support the troops in Vietnam. I'm incredibly tired of this Red America/Blue America bullshit which basically boils down to, again, how you felt about Vietnam. It was 40 years ago. I wasn't even born 40 years ago.
Imagine if we made all our decisions using this criterion: "no, I don't watch CBS tonight because I didn't like the show that aired in this timeslot 40 years ago." Get fucking lives.
If you want to debate the current election, debate what's happened in the last five years. There's plenty there to work with. Nope, wait, I'd rather talk about the decisions candidates made when they were 20. Shit, I don't even care what I did when I was 20, and it involved me.
I think we should all think really hard about what our lives are like now, and how dissimilar our current selves are to our 20-year-old selves. It doesn't matter how long ago you were 20; it could be just last year. Then we should all think about how completely pathetic it is that so much national attention is being focused on guys who are still whining about who met Jane Fonda and who was better at cards. It's like the grand triumph of Kim DuToit.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Date: 2004-08-24 03:24 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-08-24 07:26 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-08-24 08:37 pm (UTC)FYI, read
(no subject)
Date: 2004-08-25 08:31 am (UTC)love,
Romie